My name is Ember Rose and i've been cutting since 6th grade.To be honest in 6th grade i really didn't have the guts to use a razor so I broke pencils in half and shoved them in my skin until it bleed.In 7th grade I began using a razor they were light cuts enough to make it bleed and relieve some of the anger and pain i felt,i'm going to high school this year and my cuts are no longer light they're deep. I've expressed my self through poems but lately i've been on a writers block for quite some time now,I get pissed of easily and people today are the reason why i cut myself they don't understand me they see the scars on my arms and they say i belong in a loonybin! but they don't know that they are part of the reason why i do it.Even now if someone upsets me or gets me mad i use my razor blades to kill all my pain,i hope in high school it'll be better but i've wanted that all my life.I wanted to fit in,to be cool,but i was always rejected.The same thing will happen in high school i've been an outcast all my life.Now i'm true to my self(even though i still cut)i'm completely punk,even though i've been called a freak,etc.back then i used to be suicidal but now i'm just young and angry.I'm 15 and sometimes when the pain is just to much i crave my blades mainly when i don't have them.My life is fucked up and i'm alone,my friends try to help me but they don't understand they tell me to stop but it's not as easy as they think i've tried to explain to them that its just like smoking once you start sometimes you just can't give it up(i don't smoke).This is why a razor is my pain killer.