She has everything. She has parents who love her, friends who call her, extra spending money, talent, good looks, and good grades. She has potential and everyone believes in her and wants to help her achieve greatness. And here she comes complaining that her parents are overprotective. She cuts herself with any object sharp enough to make a dent and says that she is a bad person. She says that she does not deserve all her life has to offer her. She says that she would gladly trade places with that AIDS orphan she saw starving to death on channel four news. She had a perfectly good childhood. She got plenty of positive attention from her family members and very little negative. Even so, she has tried to kill herself more than once.

One time she was institutionalized for being suicidal even when she wasn't. She is on so many anti-depressants, mood stabilizers and anti-psychotics she can't remember the names or doses to all of them any more, and the times she has a couple beers at a friend's party she winds up having to be rushed to the hospital in an ambulance to have her stomach pumped.

This has happened more than once. She just shrugs her shoulders and takes another swig from the whiskey bottle. I don't give a shit, says she. I want to die anyhow. Why not die while happily numb in the beautiful escape of drunkenness? She wants to escape her throbbing mind in which pain and remorse reside. She avoids her loved ones because of the guilt she feels for hurting both them and herself. She doesn't know why she cannot find a natural way to be happy. She knows that she should be content with what she has. The doctors tell her it's just a chemical imbalance and shove more pills down her throat.

Overwhelmed with anger, frustration and confusion, she smashes the vodka bottle, neck in her fist. Glass shards splinter like murderous diamonds across the wooden floor of her bedroom. The broken glass swirls in red rivers running down from between her breasts, over her belly and milky thighs, glass embedded in the soft flawless flesh underneath her jaw. A scrawled note reads: "I think I forgot to take my medications again this morning. OOPS... I'll do better next time."