My name is Matt Wilson, I am 19 years old and this is my personal story dealing with Self injury its still going on but I am on the road to recover.
I wasn't born healthy, i was born with a condition called polysistic kidneys basically it meant my kidneys had holes in it and I was sick. Life was ok up until 1994 the doctors called and wanted me to go to the hospital and i had to get a kidney transplant. After 9 months of tubes, and operations I was fine to go home. Time passed and when I was 17 I got my first taste of SI, my cousin had come up from his hometown and I noticed he had scars on his wrists I asked him about it and he told me it was because he was unhappy. Seeing as I just broke up with a girl plus i was getting picked on at school i went into the bathroom and took a knife and cut my skin, I watched the blood drip out of the wound it felt so good.
More time passed and everything seemed to be going good until my uncle died outside my house, I was 18 at the time. He got shot by some assholes!!!!! so that night while everyone was sleeping I walked into the bathroom once again and started to cry then I remembered how good I felt when I cut when I was 17 so I grabbed a razor blade and slashed myself 3 times on my arms and about 4 times on my legs, I sat there crying and bleeding I finally got up walked out of the bathroom and went to sleep, about 2 months after I met my ex girlfriend, at first things were going fine then i find out that she was just using me for sex she was a whore!, I got mad when she broke up because I was too controlling, sorry but the fact that she hugs a whole bunch of guys makes me feel like a bad boyfriend and stuff. So there I was back in the bathroom bleeding but this time I cut too deep and had to be rushed to the hospital they told me if i did that again i would be sent to a hospital for a 28 day observation. I told them I wouldn't do it again and went home but as soon as i got home I cut my arm again. Threw out the summer time I kept cutting my wrists arms, legs even my stomach time to time. School started up again and I refused to go everything in my life was spiraling downward until one day in December I met my girlfriend Tina. She is making everything better. She holds me when I cry and helps me day to day with the urge to hurt or cut myself when I am feeling depressed. I love her to death she is like my guardian angel sent to me in a time of need.
Even though I still cut time to time when I am feeling depressed and I am alone, she is always there for me.
Thanks for reading if you have a comment email me.